NET DRAMA: A POEMZ

NET DRAMA by elgar 2006

Upon this very spot they duelled
those conjurers of ancient lore
Grand Aethelsten the eye of ten
and Raeduwulf who went before
and still this place at times resounds
with sounds of cracking thunder claps
and eerie incantations sleep
amongst the wheeling horseshoe bats

The first to put his skills to test
was Aethelsten the eye of ten
a sorcerer of note renowned
for serving courts of sixteen crowns
attired in robes of fur and silk
in deepest blue as dark as ink
he turned unto the crowd and smiled
then gave the throng a knowing wink

Upon this very spot he stopped
and stooped then scooped a palm of dirt
and scattered just like sewing seed
the crumbs of earth upon the ground
and from the places where it fell
the droughty earth did quake and cleave
and bursting forth from earth to sky
appeared a wall of willow trees

“Behold my powers doubters here
and recognize my magic’s strength
the greatest sorcerer of all
Grand Aethelesten the eye of ten!”

And from the crowd there stepped a man
as steeped in wizardry as stones
that rise above the barrows hewn
from long dead giant's shoulder bones
old Raeduwulf of woodland kin
who bore a staff of mother oak
a sorcerer of ancient birth
and champion of Northern folk

“Your skills are fabled Aethelsten
a most impressive spell indeed
but I can summon forces here
to break your wall of bark and leaf”

And then with incantations spat
and lost across a hundred tongues
he charmed a nearby mouse to rest
and at the rodent magic flung
and where there once had been a mouse
there stood a huge and wrathful beast
that tore and slashed with tooth and claw
and broke the wall with fearful ease

“My skills have won the day” he cried
now bow before my mastery
my sorcery cannot be matched
with feeble spells and trickery”

Upon this very spot just then
Grand Aethelsten the eye of ten
bellowed loud and waved his fists
invoking waves of choking mists
that swirled and danced in craz-ed rings
and bound his foe in ether chains
and then the beast of foreign name
was banished back from whence it came

“Not quite as picturesque as trees
but far more telling you'll agree
so now accede you foolish man
and I'll release my magic bands”

And with a twitch of both his thumbs
old Raeduwulf cast off his bonds
and raised his magic staff aloft
and stirred the clouds into a froth
and from above appeared a bird
with talons big as stable doors
who swooped upon Grand Aetheslten
and up into the heavens bore

“Good riddance” cried old Raeduwulf
his foe a speck upon the sky
“Let's see you break my raptor's grip
or should I say let's see you 'try'

But then just as he claimed his win
saluting all to much acclaim
the wing road tore and filled with blood
then spawned a snake of smoke and flame
upon which rode Grand Aethelsten
in chariot of magic name
drawn by wolves that howled and snarled
by incantation heeled and tamed

“Your eagle's will might hold a man
with lesser games than mine to play
it seems our skills are matched so well
that none shall win this duel today”

Upon this very spot they sat
and took repose upon the ground
and spoke in tongues as old as rain
as others watched from all around
of places lost and favour won
in days where mist had grimly clung
about the earth in yester-times
on lake and glen when man was young

And so they set their ills aside
dispatched their vanities to rust
like punctured helms of fallen men
on fields stained red by battle lust
and so resolved to likened whim
Grand Aethelsten the eye of ten
and Raeduwulf who went before
laid their staffs upon the floor

'tis best to bend the boughs with fruit
and fill our plates with nature's spoils
to bind the furrowed soil with root
and ease the peoples daily toils
than fight a war that can't be won
against a foe whose mirrored gaze
is not much different than the son's
whom by your mother once was raised



elgar's picture




phactorri's picture

tao longs. i gotz board.

tao longs. i gotz board.

...cokaru...'s picture

You really are the

You really are the internet's leading poet?!

<3

Unovegan's picture

yeah?!

yeah?!

...cokaru...'s picture

Don't be jealous, Uno. I'm

Don't be jealous, Uno. I'm sure you're the internet's leading something.

chunky_chicken's picture

i think he holds the title

i think he holds the title for biggest DORK!

Unovegan's picture

Watch your back Coloradoan.

Watch your back Coloradoan. I'm coming.
I didn't know you were so into dorks.

chunky_chicken's picture

omg! i'm so scared! i just

omg! i'm so scared! i just wet myself.

...cokaru...'s picture

Coloradoans usually are,

Coloradoans usually are, aren't they? Especially ones that move there from the dirty south.

Unovegan's picture

me? jealous of an

me? jealous of an englishman? ..... please!!

elgar's picture

I forgive you. Come give me

I forgive you. Come give me hug.

...cokaru...'s picture

Awwww. You two are so sweet.

Awwww. You two are so sweet. :)

elgar's picture

He is clearly attracted to

He is clearly attracted to my stiff English upper lip.

Unovegan's picture

no. i think that i would be

no. i think that i would be attracted to your stiff English moustache. please cut the rest off and i guarantee the ladies will be swarming. like a pack of geese.

fatsaints's picture

why we picking on english?

why we picking on english? this is no fair!1!!!

chunky_chicken's picture

you left this one WIDE open.

you left this one WIDE open.

elgar's picture

I set em up so you can knock

I set em up so you can knock them down.

chunky_chicken's picture

givem' the old one/two

givem' the old one/two

Unovegan's picture

never mind.

never mind.

chunky_chicken's picture

no. bring it.

no. bring it.

Unovegan's picture

Addiction: me running and

Addiction: me running and sneaking in the house whilst i'm outside planting a cactus cuz i want to nail you people so badly. Also trying to not let my dad see me doing this as he'll realize that i have a problem.

...cokaru...'s picture

*laugh* Let me know what

*laugh* Let me know what support group ends up helping you out with this. In other news, you're going to get nailed by us whether you're here to try to stop it or not. :) Btw, your poppy probably already knows you have a problem. Probably a problem that's difficult to pronounce.

Unovegan's picture

it's not a pronunciation

it's not a pronunciation thing. it's a coming up with the word i'm thinking of issue. get it right, COKARU.

...cokaru...'s picture

An issue of him coming up

An issue of him coming up with the word that you're thinking of? Well, shouldn't be too hard. You're pretty transparent, sir.

Unovegan's picture

madam, who's him?

madam, who's him?

...cokaru...'s picture

Read, up, Sir. This thread

Read, up, Sir. This thread got started b/c I said your pop probably already knows you have a problem, that's difficult to pronounce.
Photobucket

Unovegan's picture

10 4

10 4

...cokaru...'s picture

10-200

10-200

Unovegan's picture

10 37 for you. you'll like

10 37 for you. you'll like that one. even though 10 200 is very handy. you should use it at work. they'd appreciate it. especially ??? (damn problem again-the guy in the pic)Dinky. YES!!!

...cokaru...'s picture

(damn problem again-the guy

(damn problem again-the guy in the pic) Dinky. YES!!!

Man, you lost me on that part. But you seem happy, so I'll let you to it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Unovegan's picture

i meant that Dinky would

i meant that Dinky would appreciate 10 200. but, for a minute i forgot his name (what a shock). but, i came through.

chunky_chicken's picture

i'm going with 10 96

i'm going with 10 96

Unovegan's picture

good girl. 10 37 at work

good girl. 10 37 at work means we need a psychological workup asap. i was going to say that that applies to you very nicely as well.

chunky_chicken's picture

*****************************

**************************************
i'm glad to see that we're on the same page. =]

Unovegan's picture

i'm here to support you.

i'm here to support you. even if that means some therapy.

chunky_chicken's picture

and i'll support you. lately

and i'll support you. lately i think you need it more than i.*********************************************************

Unovegan's picture

which is?

which is?

chunky_chicken's picture

look it up.

look it up.

chunky_chicken's picture

maybe you need to check into

maybe you need to check into rehab.

...cokaru...'s picture

Englishmen have cuter

Englishmen have cuter accents too. Know what I'm just sayin?

Unovegan's picture

Know what i'm just sayin?

Know what i'm just sayin? That's great even if takes a while to figure it out. i'm just sayin.

elgar's picture

We also have village fetes,

We also have village fetes, a disgusting class structure and rampant corporate chauvenism.

Unovegan's picture

That's sad. As Americans,

That's sad. As Americans, we're perfect. Just read up on our current president. I wish Mr. Bush could run again.

chunky_chicken's picture

i sence a jealous tone in

i sence a jealous tone in that comment.

...cokaru...'s picture

I do too. *whistle*

I do too. *whistle*

Unovegan's picture

Jealousy that a midwestern

Jealousy that a midwestern twenty something 4 eyed woman is using my saying.

chunky_chicken's picture

and that would be?

and that would be?

Unovegan's picture

*slap*

*slap*

...cokaru...'s picture

Using your sayin', and using

Using your sayin', and using it better than you. Know what I mean?

Photobucket

Unovegan's picture

no, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU

no, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

...cokaru...'s picture

That's okay. I didn't really

That's okay. I didn't really expect you to understand. Know what I'm sayin? ::pats you on the head::

Photobucket

elgar's picture

Kum ba yah, my lord, Kum ba

Kum ba yah, my lord, Kum ba yah!
Kum ba yah, my lord, Kum ba yah!
Kum ba yah, my lord, Kum ba yah.
O Lord, Kum ba yah

COME ON EVERYONE, ALL TOGETHER NOW!

Someone's crying, Lord, Kum ba yah!
Someone's crying, Lord, Kum ba yah!
Someone's crying, Lord, Kum ba yah!
O Lord, Kum ba yah

TAKE IT TO THE BRIDGE!

Someone's singing, Lord, Kum ba yah!
Someone's singing, Lord, Kum ba yah!
Someone's singing, Lord, Kum ba yah!
O Lord, Kum ba yah

UH UH UH

Someone's praying, Lord, Kum ba yah!
Someone's praying, Lord, Kum ba yah!
Someone's praying, Lord, Kum ba yah!
O Lord, Kum ba yah

...cokaru...'s picture

*sings along, loud and off

*sings along, loud and off key*

elgar's picture

Life is too short really

Life is too short really isn't it?

...cokaru...'s picture

Sho is, Elgar. Please let me

Sho is, Elgar. Please let me know if you need any more services of a hype man. I am proficient in positive motivational techniques which include, but are not limited to, encouraging people to wave their hands in the air like they just don't care, throwing their hands up, and dropping it like it's hot.

Tiggy's picture

ROTFLOLOLOLOL!!!!!! GAWD I

ROTFLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!

GAWD I love this chic! :D

elgar's picture

You have to be kidding. I

You have to be kidding. I am the Henry Irving in this relationship and you are Bram Stoker. My fame is transient yet your name will be etched in history for all time (and I don't mean in an Ozymandian fashion). The only problem is that you might be dead when you finally make the trades ok?

//backflip

...cokaru...'s picture

That's what he said.

That's what he said.

Unovegan's picture

That's what she said.

That's what she said.

Bambina's picture

Bunny Bread. :ducks:

Bunny Bread.

:ducks:

Member Login
Create New Account
Retrieve Password